This post is how to avoid being befoogled, which I have defined as not having the time to Google somebody before you meet them in real life.

It’s obvious that the moral of the story is to Google before you go. But what is the story here?

First of all, I’m an introvert. I can almost guarantee you don’t really know what being an introvert really means, so you should go read Jonathan Raunch’s article in The Atlantic for to find out. Basically, it means I am somebody “who loves quiet conversations about feelings or ideas, and can give a dynamite presentation to a big audience, but [can possibly] seem awkward in groups and maladroit at small talk.”

In addition to being an introvert, I’m a nerd, therefore I need context. This is particularly important in face-to-face conversation, which is forcing me to actively control my Nerd Attention Deficiency Disorder.

Don’t get me wrong. I love conversation. In fact, in some ways, I live for it, particularly deep, serious, engaging, inspiring conversation. But in order to get to that level, we have to get to know each other first.

It’s no big surprise that the internet is the answer. Googling somebody before you meet them is a great way to put a person in context and deem their relevancy to you.

If I have the chance to Google you before I meet you, then you can bet I have thoroughly perused your blog, surveyed your Facebook, looked at your work history on LinkedIn, read through your updates on Twitter, and poked around in your online thoughtstream by studying what you’ve been linking to in your Tumblr. I might have even gone to see your photos on Flickr or watched some of your videos on YouTube or Vimeo.

By grokking all of the information I’ve just gone and gathered about you, I am able to form a fairly complete picture about you. I’ve put you in context. I have a framework within which to work. I have a lot of relevant information, and now I can start the process of thinking about how I can help you, how you can help me, and any possible projects or opportunities for us to collaborate.

In the old days, this might be called stalking, but I prefer to think about it as dedication. Dedication to you. I have identified you as Somebody I Want to Know, therefore I am stalking you out of respect.

Stalking out of respect? What?

Yes. I truly appreciate the value of the time you are willing spend with me in real life. Therefore I stalk you in advance, out of respect for the value of all of the time you’ve already spent diligently documenting your thoughts, interests, and opinions in online outlets. And when you impress me, I feed your blog into my Reader, friend you on Facebook, follow you on Twitter, and/or all of the above. I keep stalking you because I admire the contributions you are making to the digital space.

It all comes down to a simple equation of efficiency and efficacy. When I meet you, I want to be able to have a meaningful interaction with you. Perhaps your elevator speech or your cocktail party summary has the off-chance of sparking an interesting conversation, but it is simply not an effective way to foster meaningful interaction. And making you sit there and recount your life story is certainly isn’t efficient use of your time. Or mine.

So-called ’stalking’ is a way to accelerate the path to meaningful interaction. The internet is responsible for changing where relationships begin.

If you could help it, you wouldn’t want to meet an author without reading his book. And the internet means that everybody is now an author. They are a creator of content. Their life is an open book.

So, turn the page, and get to reading.